Monday, February 20, 2006

The Artist's Way Week #7

Week #7- Recovering a Sense of Connection

*Week 6*

"Living is a form of not being sure, not knowing what next or how. The moment you know hoe, you begin to die a little. The artist never entirely knows. We guess. We may be wrong, but we take leap after leap in the dark." -Agnes De Mille

"There is no must in art because art is free." -Wassily Kandinsky

"We cannot escape fear. We can only transform it into a companion that accompanies us open all our exciting adventures...Take a risk a day-one small or bold stroke that will make you feel great once you have done it." -Susan Jeffers

"Trust in yourself. Your perceptions are often, far more accurate than you are willing to believe." -Claudia Black

"When an inner situation is not made conscious, it appears outside as fate." C.G. Jung

Art is not about thinking something up. It is about the opposite- getting something down.

Art is an act of tuning in and dropping down the well. It is as though all the stories, painting, music, performances in the world live just under the surface of our normal consciousness. Like an underground river, they flow through us as a stream of ideas that we can tap down into.

Once you accept that it is natural to create, you cane begin to accept a second idea- that the creator will hand you what ever you need for the project. The minute you are willing to accept the help of this collaborator, you will see useful bits of help everywhere in your life. Be alert: there is a second voice, a higher harmonic, adding to and augmenting your inner creative voice. This voice frequently shops itself in synchronicity.

You will hear the dialogue you need, find the right song for the sequence, see the exact paint color you almost had in mind, and so forth. You will have the experience of finding things- books, seminars, tossed-out stuff- that happen to fit what you are doing.

Learn to accept the possibility that the universe is helping you with what you are doing. Become willing to see the hand of God and accept it as a friend's offer to help with what you are doing. Because many of us unconsciously harbor the fearful belief that God would find our creations decadent or frivolous or worse, we tend to discount this creator-to-creator help.

My jealously had actually been a mask for my fear of doing something I really wanted to do but was not yet brave enough to take action forward. Jealousy is always a mask for fear: fear that we aren't able to get what we want, frustration that somebody else seems to be getting what is rightfully ours even if we are far too frightened to reach for it. At its root, jealousy is a stingy emotion. It doesn't allow for the abundance and multiplicity of the universe. Jealousy tells us there is room for only one- one poet, one painter, one whatever you dream of being.


Complete the following sentence...
If I didn't have to do it perfectly, I would try...
writing my books.

I don't REALLY have a perfectionist problem so it is hard for me to relate to these sections of the chapter. I do have a problem getting STARTED and instead of just flowing, I keep redoing.

The Jealousy Map
Lil Brother and Dayna, Rachel and Brian, Paul and Trisha
True love and starting their families in Buffalo.
Stop hiding from the idea of being happy and in love.

I found that when doing this exercise that I am not really a jealous person either. I like who I am and I am confident that I am doing what I am supposed to be doing, despite my Renaissance Soul nature :) I have been discovering over the last few weeks that I am looking for a partner in this game called who really *gets* this part of me and wants to share in a future. Planting roots. Falling in love. Making a family for myself. My friends are my family and I love them so, and I crave the relationship and closeness that they have with each others spouse...and always thought I wanted to find that, someday. I guess I want it more than I thought...but I sure do hide from it. I need to really believe that I am lovable. And this is hard for me to do.

ARCHAEOLOGY: An EXERCISE- Complete these phrases...
As a kid, I missed the chance with my family.
As a kid, I lacked... my own bedroom.
As a kid, I could have energy to try out for something physical.
As a kid, I dreamed... of being President.
As a kid, I wanted... a little sister. (In addition to my brother!)
In my house, we never had
As a kid, I needed more...time to be a kid.
I am sorry that I will never again dad say *I Love You*
I beat myself up about the loss childhood. (Fighting with my dad)
For years, I have missed and wondered my life would be different if Gma and Dad were still here and I spent my teenage years on Route 39.

Finish these phrases.
I have a loyal friend many people.
One thing I like about my town is...the community- feels like home.
I think I have nice...legs, boobies and a smile/laugh :)
Writing my morning pages has shown me I can...avoid and hide for no reason.
I am taking greater interest out the gunk and simplifying
I believer I am getting better at...loving myself.
My artist has started to pay more attention to...clutter.
My self-care is...improving.
I feel more...alive with possibility.
Possibly, my creativity is...ready to explode.

Make this phrase a mantra. "Treating myself like a precious object will make me strong."

Give yourself time out to listen to one side of an album, just for joy. You may want to doodle as you listen, allowing yourself to draw the shapes, emotions, thoughts you hear in the music.

Take yourself into a scared space- a church, synagogue, library, grove of trees and allow yourself to savor the silence and healing solitude.

Create one wonderful smell in your house. :)

Wear your favorite item of clothing for no special occasion.
(I always do!)

Collage: Collect a stack of at least 10 magazines which you will allow yourself to freely dismember. Set a 20 minute time limit and tear through the magazines collecting any images that reflect your life or interests. Pictorial autobiography. Include your past, present, future and your dreams.

Quickly list 5 favorite films. Anything they have in common?
Little Mermaid, Moulin Rouge, Back to the Future, Say Anything, When Harry Met Sally

Name your favorite topics to read about: politics, current events, women, friendship, love, exotic places, biographies, history.

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